he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
