So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
And despite my lack of successful relationships I'm a fucking guru
That's like claiming you're a good coach but going 2-12 last season
Randomize
