do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
My mom wants to know what to send you in a care package. She used cat emojis, so you know it's serious
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
Randomize