A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
Ya know, sometimes when he kisses me in public I want to scream "HE DRIVES A PORSCHE!" so people watching understand that I don't have low standards, I'm just very materialistic.
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
I convinced her that there were two p's in Chipotle - the 2nd one was silent.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
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