South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
We are no longer allowed to have pre 4th party week. I woke up with a donut stuck to my face and 'MILF' written in black marker on my stomach.
Mother of the Year
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
Should I put the spider I likely swallowed in my sleep into my calorie tracker?
Randomize
