Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
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