i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
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