You are an awful beat friend I am goin to die in a car accident and then my corpse is going to be used by criminals ala weekend at bernies to rob a bank then my corpse will go to jail Thanks john Thanks for nuthin
Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
Just used the salt in the bottom of my mcdonalds bag from last night on the eggs i made this morning. Way too hungover for this
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
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