they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
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