College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
I told her Billy Mays couldn't convince me to sleep with her
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
do nipples grow back?
Randomize
