will power is for people who don't want to get laid
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
Shame - the story of my life.
Randomize
