He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
there was 4 little kids screaming in high pitched voices at the top of their lungs at the sox game and their mom just leaned over to me and said 'if thats not birth control i dont know what is'
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
Randomize
