I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
Drunk me really does appreciate that sober me made a list of movies to watch when drunk it saves so much time
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
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