I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
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