im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
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