Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
I woke up face first on my living room floor arms outstretched toward the christmas tree
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
To celebrate your birthday last night, I got drunk and sang drift away in buffalo wild wings. Happy birthday. The entire bar sang the chorus with me. It was magical.
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
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