It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Randomize