Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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