I want to stick my p in your. b.
READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
Now that I'm the boss, there's nobody to yell at me for smelling like a bar in the morning.
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
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