I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
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