Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
Too bad they don't have an emoji symbol for condoms and 99 cent tacos
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Randomize
