guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
my nose is crying tears of wow.
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?