all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
I said:" get your jacket, get your beer and get the fuck out of here"
Firing someone with a rhyme is the new high point in my life.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
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