We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
Last night I made him sit on my bed and finish my burrito bowl as I chanted "brucey" over and over until he was done like they did in Matilda with the chocolate cake
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
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