check it out our google latitudes are spooning
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
Randomize
