soooo we both peed the bed last night...
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
21 Ladies Confess The Grossest Things They Do When No One’s Around
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
23 Tweets I Thought Were Really Funny When I Was Drunk Yesterday
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
I woke up with my face covered in mustard. Your mom said I ate hotdogs like a pornstar
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.