and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
Randomize
