I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic.
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
