Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
I forgot how hot balto sounded
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
I don't know how to explain to you that you tried to recreate the bit from the Dana Carvey show where a guy dressed as Bill Clinton breastfeeds a bunch of puppies
Randomize
