I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
Girls should come with a carfax report
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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