What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
He puked in the voicemail. That's a true friend right there.
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
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