If I had a nickel for every time I've used a condom, I'd have... two nickels.
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
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