Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
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