i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
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