so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
Randomize
