C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
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