Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
Good morning! Just thought I'd give you my yearly reminder that we lost our virginities 7 years ago, yesterday.
That's the best creepy text ever.
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
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