Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
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