He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
I'm "drunk text both siblings" drunk.
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
Randomize
