I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
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