just come out here and I will go home with you...
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
A drunk hobo just gave me a fist bump. Because I know what a womb is.
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
Randomize
