garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
I'm a grown ass woman and I'm sitting in bed eating pizza at 4:30 a.m. BFD, right?
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
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