Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
Something like; Dear Cupid, when are you going to send me someone to date that isn't a complete psychopath
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
Randomize
