Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
Randomize
