I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
Randomize