Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
Randomize
