Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
The low-flow toilet at my office cannot handle the intensity of this hangover.
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
Randomize
