ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
Randomize