wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
Randomize
