So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
just found out that she named her cat after me.
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
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