My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
I ran into his family and they made me a ham sandwich and I asked if they wanted to come streaking. I felt they deserved the invite.
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Randomize
